January 30, 2013


Our laptop is incredibly sensitive. The trackpad is like...HEY GUYS, GONNA DO WHATEVER I WANT KAY???????? And it's like..."oh...oh, okay..please stop...no, why? Please?"

It's bad. But at least we have a computer.

So, something is happening. It's really exciting. I haven't heard back any kind of confirmation from my Contact, so I won't say anything yet, buuuuuuuut.......

Let's just say it's pretty exciting, and it involves big changes. I think it's totally the right choice for me, and I believe that it's an open door from the Lord (though it seems too good to be true...but that's my skewed view of God, really. He doesn't ALWAYS want us to do things we think we're going to hate or whatever.)

I have told a handful of people here about it, but telling people that "I might be doing this," in real life is a bit more private than telling the internet, "I'M GONNA DO THIS." I'm still kind of in that, "Am I making this up?" phase of thinking. But, I don't think I am. I'm pretty sure it's real, and I'm pretty sure that last night both of my parents gave me their support, and I'm pretty sure that when I've been praying about it, the Lord hasn't put a check in my heart about it...not a real one, anyone. I mean, there's a difference between self doubt, and a spiritual check in your heart that something is wrong.

There's literally nothing wrong with this decision. It makes all kinds of crazy sense, which makes me think it's actually nonsense.

And it's like, it's a BIG DEAL for me. I talk about doing stuff like this, but it never actually presents itself as a real life opportunity. Just me thinking about how neat it would be if...

So, that's what's going on. I'm waiting for a solid confirmation from SOMEONE HINT HINT TEXT ME BACK. Just because I'm a little obsessive and like to know that things are settled.

I think that's it. Pirate Day was a success. The other day, I had to wait a million hours for my coffee at Starbucks, so I got a certificate for a free drink. It's sitting in my car until further notice. I bought some moccasin slippers yesterday from Target. I have literally been waiting so many months for them to go on clearance, and finally, yesterday, there they were. It was thrilling. And worth it. I came so close, so many times, to just blowing twenty bucks on them, but I know they aren't worth that much. Thirteen was much more feasible. If I had been even more patient, I probably could have gotten them cheaper, but I'm not.

My mom and I are going to see Lincoln tomorrow, with Priscilla and her mom. Should be a good time. I've heard nothing but god things about the movie. The man's method of acting seems incredibly legit, and I'm excited to watch it. I also adore Sally Field. Love her all kinds of lots.

I think that's about it. Hopefully I get what I'm waiting for to feel peace of mind about declaring this all over the interwebs SOON. Because I'm excited. And nervous. And doubting. And yet not doubting at all. But that's normal when you're about to do something this big, right?

I mean, I never thought that I would REALLY ever do something like this. That it would just be something I talked about and dreamed about doing. That's one way of knowing that this has to be the Lord because it's quite literally a dream come true. So, yeah.

And if you're any amount of observant, you might be able to figure out what I'm doing. I feel like I'm practically giving it away. lol

EDIT: Story time. So, last month, about a week before my Grandma passed away, I wrote to the yogurt company, Chobani, and thanked them for their product because it was really all my grandma could eat at that point. They wrote me back, about two or three days before she passed, and said that they were sorry to hear that she was sick, and that they were going to send us a box of vanilla yogurt (the flavor that she could take because it didn't have any fruit pieces in it.)

Well, we received that shipment a few days ago. Of course, it was a little sad, but just the fact that they did it was so genuinely kind.

Today, I got another email from them. The lady who wrote said that she came across my previous email, and wanted to reach out to me. She said that they wanted to send us some of their new products, etc for us to enjoy. I wrote her back, explaining that my grandma had passed away, so I didn't want them to feel obligated to do it.

She just wrote again, sending her condolences, and they're going to send us yogurt anyway.

I mean, who does that? Who, in a big corporate company opens up an old email and says, "Hey, let's send this family more free stuff!" What? Who does that? I'm literally amazed by their kindness.

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