February 24, 2014

I don't mean to intrude...

I don't like talking about my faith.

Rather, I don't like feeling like I'm pushing my faith onto other people. The problem, is that despite the fact that I respect people's choices, and beliefs, and decisions, God, and His timeless promises have brought me through too much for me to not know beyond the shadow of a doubt that He is true, and His promises are true forever, and that He is the one person that we can constantly trust, and rely on, and cling to. In good times, bad times, stressful times.

It's like, I don't want you to think that I'm trying to choke you with what I believe, but I'm so overwhelmed by the reality of who God has proven Himself to be in my life that I can't NOT say anything.

I mean, I think back to 2011-2012, the worst year of my life, when things were literally crumbling around me. I had nothing to stand on. My life was nothing but torment and stress and depression, and yet the promises...I don't know how many times I had to tell myself that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. And how many times I held God to that, letting Him know very clearly that it was too much, and yet this inexplicable peace would be able to creep into my heart, and I'd be able to go on for another hour. Another day. I could walk through my house one more time.

The promise that if we have faith the size of a grain of a mustard seed - which, I'm convinced is not just a mustard seed, which is extremely small, but the grain of one...the singular part of the many parts that make up that one tiny seed...that much faith is enough for God. And for a long time, through a lot of situations, that's all I had. Almost no faith. Just a speck of it.

And now I'm on the other side of it saying without any doubt (for now, amiright?) that God is trustworthy, and faithful. I can't give any other answer anymore. My life has been a witness to ME of God proving to be true of His character.

So whenever someone has issues, or struggles, all I can think to say is, "BUT GOD HAS THE ANSWER." If you could only bring yourself to trust Him, just this once, you would see that He is faithful, and that He loves you more than you could ever fathom!

I'm not always in a position to share this with people, when I see their pain. God doesn't always make an opportunity for me to say anything. But it's there. It's there overflowing from the top of my heart, wishing that people could only just see.

That if people could only just stop where they are for one moment, and let go of themselves, and hold on to the truth that God gives...

But it's hard. It's hard to trust God when you don't first give yourself the chance to know Him.

I wish I could do it all. But I can't. Free will, man. It's a killer.


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